So, I'm pretty convinced someone at work is trying to kill me! You know how most packages of food and stuff say do not eat if seal is broken or if package is damaged or whatever! Well there is a little refrigerator in my dad's office that we keep stocked with water bottles. The other day I pulled a water bottle out and opened it and started to drink it- nothing too unusual! I sat it on my desk and kept working. As I reached for it to take another drink, I noticed something funny about the lid! It looked like someone had cut the top off so they could put poison in! I set it to the side and got a new bottle because I was clearly disturbed that I drank from a poisoned water bottle, but I wrote it off as a faulty manufacturer- until- the next day the exact same thing happened! Clearly this is the work of a serial killer and I am the intended target! My dad's secretary thinks it was probably meant for her and I am just collateral damage, but I'm not so sure! Lucky if the bottles were poisoned he must have used ioccaine powder- because I've developed an immunity to that- and I was unaffected by any substance which most certainly could have been in the tampered water bottles! What? You don't believe me?
Here is the evidence: it speaks for itself!
Call the B.A.U or C.S.I. or S.V.U. or whatever you want! But I'm just going to have to watch my back I guess until they catch the culprit!